"But leave your roses out to die"
17:34 & 28.04.02
I talked with Craig last night. He told me to wait a couple of days and he would probably feel like talking again. It's only been 3-4 days like this, when he hasn't felt like talking iwth me.
I guess needless to say I went to bed crying. I put on my big purple Uno sweater and tried to feel better. It didn't help putting on clothes. I was as still as naked as without it. And I am still crying.
It's like he's telling me he is tired of me already. He's asking for space and I haven't given him enough I guess. I thought all the miles between us were enough.
I don't feel ready for this. I try to push that thought away. He thinks I am doubting his feelings and I don't. I doubt if we really are right for each other. - If we make each other so unhappy. Or do I really want this? Right now I just know that I am scared and as long as I don't feel safe I am not ready.
I am not willing to go through more pain (but I really love him). Especially when things should be like pink cotton candy.
[What once was beautiful
has turned bitter and cheap
so now there's nothing I can do for you
but leave your roses out to die]
A Camp.