"I Get Along Without You Wery Well (Except Sometimes)"
17:06 & 24.02.02
I get along without you very well
Of course, I do
Except when soft rains fall
And drip from leaves then I recall
The thrill of being sheltered
In your arms
Of course, I do
But I get along without you very well
I am not seeing Anders after all today. He almost broke his back in a snowboard – accident on Friday. No wonder he didn’t reply my messages on Friday, when he was busy at the hospital. He said his back would probably hurt for a few weeks. Things like this wake me up. I tend to forget that there’s a big number of people that have broken their back’s “around” me, or they have died. It’s the first time I am close to someone who has been lucky. I woke up this morning with the terrible memories from Jerry’s car accident. Ten minutes after I had kissed him good night. I told Anders that I love him (the friendly way).
I’ve had terrible nightmares. If I start having nightmares, it tends to be one every night. There’s a man who has tried to rape several girls. The rape statistics are high here. I dreamt that every man was after me, and a potential rapist. Mum said I should be careful (I’ve got my part of bad luck), even on my way home from the bus stop.
I’ve become a huge fan of “Sex in the City”. It has changed my view on things. Of course there’s quite some difference between a TV show and real life, but now the fact that I have a lover isn’t so secret any more. My flatmates still don’t know who he really is, and what sort of relationship we have, but… it’s not their business. I’ve become a little less tender. But just a little bit.
I catch myself talking from solar plexus and up, not my stomach. I think it’s because I still don’t feel "safe".